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Author Topic: Baby it's cold outside...for the horses!  (Read 51 times)

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Offline Ghosttruck

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Baby it's cold outside...for the horses!
« on: February 01, 2019, 08:12:47 am »
We all know about Florida-man but I’m going to talk about Arkansas-man on this board.  This is my first post so I’ll lay out what’s going on.  I have sources in the court and what hits the paper isn’t the full story.  The rest is usually hilarious and I’m going to be putting in the funny **** that goes on behind the scenes…

So…An Arkansas-man, let’s call him Geoff, decided to get hammered.  Now this isn’t the simplest of things because we live in what’s called a dry county.  Yeah…it sucks as much as you’d think.  No alcohol sales at all….ever!  So Geoff, went across county lines, got his booze and proceeded to drink, and drink.  The night it happened it was around 16 degrees which in Arkansas is cause for great concern.  I mean go to the store and get eggs, bread and milk…**** has just got serious!

So Geoff, all warm and snuggly in his house, full of liquor had some concerns about some horses…they could be cold, they could be hungry.  What was Geoff to do?  Steal a car!  Yep he stole a car…drove to the persons farm who’d he’d just stolen the car from and fed his horses some hay!  The arresting officer said, off the record, that Geoff had a very large Doberman with him and Geoff’s only concern was what might happen to his dog…let’s call him fluffy.  Geoff’s grandparents were finally tracked down and the reportedly very well taken care of “Fluffy” was placed with them.  That’s when Geoff decided to go peacefully off to jail, because before Geoff had a place for Fluffy he wasn't having that ****!

The local animal shelter sung Geoff’s praises because of his kindness to animals and his grandparents are proud as well!  Only the owner of the farm is pissed about the car…which was recovered, undamaged.  Chances are Geoff will get an pass on this one.  Let’s just hope he has his own ride next time he decided his neighbor’s horses are hungry and cold. 
« Last Edit: February 01, 2019, 08:14:20 am by Ghosttruck »
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Offline Knox

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Re: Baby it's cold outside...for the horses!
« Reply #1 on: February 01, 2019, 08:44:51 am »
Ghost, I think you're channeling Hagrid there with the Fluffy!! Love it, keep em coming!!  ;D
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Offline SimplySpaztastic

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Re: Baby it's cold outside...for the horses!
« Reply #2 on: February 01, 2019, 08:50:03 am »
Lol fluffy is safe.
I think i"ll go to jail now.
Lmao
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Offline KatO9Hells

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Re: Baby it's cold outside...for the horses!
« Reply #3 on: February 01, 2019, 09:32:47 am »
I have heard horror stories of the way some people keep horses and animals in Arkansas, and trust me, we have them here too. Other then the car theft I think he might have done the right thing
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Offline notchback

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Re: Baby it's cold outside...for the horses!
« Reply #4 on: February 01, 2019, 11:26:19 am »
Hey Ghosttruck, Haven't you read the rules here? No doxxing. I guess we should just call you Geoff from now on.
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Offline Ghosttruck

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Re: Baby it's cold outside...for the horses!
« Reply #5 on: February 01, 2019, 12:03:10 pm »
Ha ha ha...I promise the names are made up.

Now I have a few tales to unravel from my "friends" who are serving some time in the pen...that are so freaking funny.  I'll use their names, because they told me I could :)

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Offline Mildly Medicated

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Re: Baby it's cold outside...for the horses!
« Reply #6 on: February 01, 2019, 03:21:36 pm »
Love It !! Lived in Arkansas for many years, in a dry county, every weekend we did a run to the next county over for "supplies" LOL (I was younger and less concerned for my bodily organs)
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